The Three Kingdoms: Rebirth Review

The game begins with you getting transported back in time to the Three Kingdoms era where you assume the role of a General. There is not much explanation about the conflict or participants, so players with prior knowledge will have a huge advantage. Those unfamiliar with the period, like me, may find the story hard to latch onto.

The plot jumps between characters and locations enough to make you check if your health insurance covers whiplash. Outside the 7 love interests, there are countless bit characters that have nearly meaningless scenes. There are so many that it is impossible to do any of them justice in the game’s short runtime—the first run through will take under 3 hours. In addition to these skin-deep characters, the game is rarely funny. And there are several poor AI videos that depict large battles.

The love interests are the biggest drawcard because three are played by actresses that were in the original Love is All Around. This trio are the main romances, since they appear early and remain involved. Zhong Chenyao and Zu Jiajia, as Cai Zhaoji and Xiao Qiao respectively, put together excellent performances and are the best choice for romantics. Wang Xingchen is fine as Zhen Fu too, but the camera spends a comically absurd about of time focusing on her ample cleavage.

Most other love interests don’t get enough screen time. You can count the scenes for your death warrior, Huinu, on one mutilated hand. Sun Shanxiang appears more, but her warrior-princess shtick turns her into a love-struck klutz. Da Qiao is devoted but a blank slate. So only the main romances have passable depth; the rest are just there to fill your harem.

Chapter 6 saves the game. It is the equivalent of a stay of execution seconds before midnight. This final chapter is massive and makes up more than half the game. There are long branching paths based on choices related to armies, items, and relationships. We love choice and consequence! Even if it creates a messier narrative and the timeline menu lags. There are a few good endings to see, including more appearances by the lesser romance options. It really does alleviate the suffering.

Players need to be clear what they’re getting with Three Kingdoms: Rebirth and it is not a cohesive story. Characters are spread thinner than rice-paper and scenes jump around more than a Kangaroo on meth. If you adore the actresses, or are prepared to dance around the timeline like a maniac to unlock a huge final chapter, then the game will earn its pass mark. But, even then, players should temper their expectations if they value characterisation or plot.